deja vu

I'm really confused and fed up with this shit.
for those with moderate curiosity to what is happening link to a catch up journal is here (click on the 'h')
Yea, you can take all of that with a grain of salt.
I am not religious. (I'm agnostic and I could care less about deities and what they think of me.) I don't really believe much unless it has pure factual evidence. Sadly enough, I cannot give you that evidence. So please take my word for it but thats all I can supply.
This odd occurrence has lingered the majority of my life. As a kid I knew we were going to theme parks or zoos long before we went. I wish I could say a way that would help you understand better but I can't. The only thing I can say that might open your mind a bit is that we only see and hear 1% of what's going on around us. The rest we are blind to.
I'm writing this journal that I've been putting off since november. But fuckit I'm going to write it now since I'll probably forget.
I'll start at the beginning; I hate fireworks.
Another bonfire night and I usually prefer to watch from a window but I get persuaded to go outside. I see family setting up a cheap firework they grabbed on the way here. I'm waiting behind a car because as I mentioned before. I fucking hate fireworks. I begin to feel REALLY sick and that whole deja vu feeling comes over me. If you've read the other journal you know thats usually not a good thing. I start walking back towards the house. Then I see a bright orange flash from where I was standing. The firework had fallen over (My family didn't set it up right not the firework creators fault) and it had started firing off in my direction. Ironic that the person with a crippling fear of fireworks is meters away from where they're going off. So I'm freaking out and hauling ass. I really fucking hate fireworks. numerous of those colourful pieces of shit explode behind me and I'm wearing a fucking wooly jumper so if I get hit its gonna look like the jeff the killer story by the end of it. 
None the less a rainbow of fiery shit is going off behind me and some fucker locked the door. I run round the house and hide in the back garden. I hate those burning twats.
The only one to get hurt was my aunt when a firework bounced off her. Nobody noticed me leave or saw me running from the fireworks. They'd probably call bullshit on me if I mentioned this. 
whats the point of this journal

I fucking hate fireworks.