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Permanent marker revenge

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Do not attack Sam 
Or do underage drinking to stop sleepwalking and fall asleep in the middle of a woods and come across the guy who you just attacked's best friend
who has permanent marker
He wrote cannibal on his cheek
=w= I would of written far worse things but he's to innocent for that shit.
So yea
I kinda wanted to do a little story behind what the fuck happened before and after:

Sam: dude don't kill me
Oscar:...why not...
Sam: Because...I swear to god if you eat me you'll be sick
Oscar:...how many time's have I heard that do you think?
Sam: seriously...I am not worth it 
Oscar...*sighs*
Sam: Does someone need a hug
Oscar: GOD NO
Sam: huggggggggg
Oscar: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO GOD NO *stabs him in the arm*
Sam: JESUS FUCKING CHRIST DUDE WHAT THE HELL WHY DID YOU STAB ME BRO
Oscar:...I don't do guy hugs...If you're not dating me you have no right to hug me...unless we are friends...you are none of those things
Sam:...wait what was that abo-
Oscar: what
Sam: are yo-
Oscar: ohhhhhhh goooooooooooooood nooooooooo
Sam: eue... no...homo
*Sam runs off*
Oscar: GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE AND GET STABBED LIKE A MAN
Sam: NEVAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I NEED TO STAY ALIVE
Oscar: *tackles Sam* DON'T YOU EVER SAY THAT AGAIN OR I WILL HOT GLUE YOUR LIPS TOGETHER
Sam: So are you Bi or whatever
Oscar: why does this matter I'm going to stab you either way
Sam: well...what are you, if I'm gonna die it isn't like it's gonna matter telling some dead guy
Oscar: Yes I am Bi- Now hold still so I can stab your freaking neck already
Sam: *sucker punches Oscar* HAHA I KNOW YOUR SECRET
Oscar:...;-; that was mean *sobbing*
Sam: *from a distance shouting* DON'T WORRY BRO. DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU CHOOSE YOUR STILL A DANGEROUS MAN WITH SOME SERIOUS PROBLEMS
Oscar: *shouting* THANK YOU
(later on)
Oscar: what the he- *pulls out mirror from bag*
DAMMIT! *picks up note*
WHO DA FAQ IS X!!!!
*uncontrollably swearing*

Yea. He's Bi...mostly because most psychopaths are known to be rather open for relationships and will probably have multiple relationships with both genders *I can't remember where I read that but it doesn't surprise me* but he's quite shy about it oddly enough and well for Sam, He just pushes everyone's buttons and gets everyone angry for the fun of it, he doesn't really care about sexuality though. So that's how Sam got stabbed...he said "no homo" and X freaked out about it.
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